Dude. All he needed was the beer-bong hat, cocaine pipe, & draft deferral in his paw, & he’d be back in college (getting a C+).
“I am sooo wasted!”
“Oh man, Condi’s just gotta get me one of these!”
“Practicing my ‘Cheney look’… bet he’d love to shoot him a Panda… in the face!” 
“Heheheh. I could totally tap that, & they’d still blame Clinton!” 